I felt it.
Her arms wrapping around me, embracing me with such love, such meaning, such happiness in a tight – yet gentle embrace.
Her forearms rubbing up and down my back as she soaked in every second of the hug that I so desperately needed.
Everything in that moment was ok. Everything was possible. Every worry melted away from my thoughts, and I believed that I could do anything I wanted to, in that moment. It was all ok.
…and then I woke up.
Referred to as her “big girl” as a small child, her sunshine (that lights the world and without it, there would only be darkness), her miracle baby… I felt important. One of a kind. I could make any difference that I chose to make, and I was capable of making the world a better place at any minute that I was called to.
She believed in me like no one ever has.
She saw a spark in me that no one else can find.
She loved every part of me, and made sure that I didn’t doubt her love for any moment of time.
She supported me. She was always there for me, no matter what, when, where, or how.
She made the biggest difference in my life.
July 15, 2018, God needed His angel back by His side.
March 30, 2019, I’m still not sure how to fill the void that was yanked from my heart.
It hurts now worse than it has yet to.
I guess I’m just realizing how
I really am without her here.