I’m difficult to be around at times. Other times, I’m a complete joy.
I’m not a good roommate. I’m picky in just about every sense of the word.
Sometimes, I complain without knowing that I do. But I don’t mean to.
Other times, I lose my temper before I get the chance to cool down.
I’m not a people person – after I’ve been burned and misunderstood so many times.
At times, I just don’t have the strength to make it one more tiny second.
I’m in pain every second of every day.
And all of these unforeseen diagnoses have brought sorrow to my husband and I in more ways that I could count.
But I do know amongst all of these facts,
My heart is warm and made completely of gold – if you can break down the walls surrounding it.
I want to forgive you (generally grouped with the human kind who have hurt me so badly), please just give me time to build trust.
Even though things aren’t perfect with my health, they could always be worse.
I make the best out of every situation – maybe I’ll have to take a second to switch my brain from what I was expecting first, though.
I smile at people even if they don’t smile at me, because I know that everyone smiles in the same language. And there’s been times where I wish that someone had smiled at me.. a stranger… anyone.
I have a husband who puts up with more than I can see that I put him through.
I have an amazing family who has tried their best, though some still working to, adjust to my new life, as my old one is gone away for good.
I have a new appreciation for butterflies and all delicate things, such as life.
I’m an artist, I’m a writer, I’m a lover, and I’m a survivor.
I’m strong, I’m brave, I’m a warrior, and this is my calling.
I never want to leave anyone’s presence without them feeling better the when I invaded their bubble.
I’m my husband’s biggest fan, and I’m my own biggest hero, sometimes I even need some help though.
The crazy point to all of this (words have been switched around and replaced to fit for me) is:
If you cannot handle me as I go through my mental, emotional, and physical breakdowns, then you sure as hell don’t deserve to waste my scarce moments of complete and total happiness that I could rather spend with my husband or family.
Above all: I will not let my health define me.
Time is precious. Take your time and cherish it deeply, because we never know when it’s going to end. ❤️✝️