This is this weeks weather forecast. It’s been so hot, and storming somewhere near if not at my home on a nightly basis for a couple days now. Why and how the weather has some type of connection to my pain is beyond me..
It’s been such a long time since my pain has been 10/10…
With all of the chaos that’s been showing up by surprise to greet us so very generously, I just need rest. And rest in a time like this, is MORE than farrrrrrrrrr impossible.
“You must think I’m strong
To give me what I’m going through.
Well forgive me if I’m wrong,
But this looks like more than I can do… on my own…
I know I’m not strong enough to be everything that I’m supposed to be –
“I give up. I’m not strong enough…
.. hands of mercy won’t you cover me?
Lord, right now I’m asking you to be strong enough
For both of us.”
Well, maybe that’s the point:
To reach the point of giving up.
Because when I finally hit rock bottom,
That’s when I start looking up – and reaching out.
I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.
No, I don’t have to be
I hope for strength to be patient with myself, with my pain and the ability to cope with life during this flare.
I pray for my husband’s stress to be lifted away, and for his absolute exhaustion to be turned into comfort.
I call for understanding from our God up above….the ways He has of understanding…. please give my small family the ability to be still through this tornado that has our lives spinning around us.
I pray, and silently know, that You can read my mind… because the words fail to come to mind for what I’m trying to say.
You are such a wonderful Father, Lord.
Forgive me for attempting to take control of my life. Forgive me for being no greater than a sinner.
For You know the plans You have for me. And You have given Your life so that I may live mine.
I pray that this test is not too far gone for me to be able to pass in Your kind, loving, and forgiving heart.
Thank you for all that You have done, continue to do, and what you are working on for us in which we have no knowledge of.
I love you dear God.
“Take my life, take my mind
Take my soul, take my will; I am Yours now, I give it all to you. “
- Quotes are songs by Mathew West & Jeremy Camp